Drawback

One of the drawbacks to surviving sexual child abuse, is that almost any argument or confrontation that, the particular person has seems like the end of the world.  For instance if I think someone is mad at me, I can’t take it, I try to fix it.  Sometimes people just don’t like you and it can’t be fixed.  Then sometimes when you get into a big argument with people you love, and things are said that hurt you, you feel like your going to be abandoned, in my case my mother didn’t protect me on several occasions even into adulthood, so when someone says, “I’m tired of this,” I think they’re saying they don’t love me or want me anymore.  I was also abandoned by my 2nd husband for another woman, I tend to feel like I’m not wanted anywhere.  Now even though that’s not true, (I Hope), they are still valid feelings.  I have to work through them and try to understand #1 that every confrontation, is not the end of the world, #2 that if someone does decide to leave you and you’ve tried every possible way to make it right, well, it’s on them.  If they leave you, you will survive.  I have God, and with Him on my side, how can I fail.

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