My daughters have decided to involve my mother in their lives again. Which brings me to the matter at hand. I sent a text to my mother the other day explaining how I felt. That maybe I just needed time after the last thing that her husband had done to me. Long story short she said, “Pray about it, you may not need me.” Wow, a mother tells her child that she may not need her. I am in a state of decision. Can I talk to my mother and not think about her betrayal.? Can I talk to her and not feel continuously victimized? I’m not sure, but it is something I am deciding on. On one hand, I don’t want to be in her negativity, but then I think of her death, and how I would feel if I didn’t get to say goodbye. This is definitely not a decision to be made lightly. Yes, I am praying.
This Easter was a reminder considering I tried to commit suicide, on Easter in 2204.